Analyzing Life and Womanhood Through the Martha Stewart Documentary

Martha Stewart

If you haven’t yet experienced the new Martha Stewart documentary on Netflix, consider this your invitation to do just that. If you have, then you’ll understand why we absolutely need to discuss it!

Besides being a visual delight, the documentary was almost like a long, deep conversation with a girlfriend, that pushed me to reflect on my own life, on womanhood in general and on many of the themes I often explore here at In Vibrant Company.

Martha’s journey is so much more than a business success story; it’s a roadmap for how we navigate ambition, relationships, identity, and reinvention. She’s lived through phases of life that resonate deeply with many many women. Each chapter of her life, from her unapologetic pursuit of perfection to her personal struggles, felt like a mirror, calling up questions and perspectives many of us can relate to.

Let’s dive in!

Half Goddess. Half Hell

There’s something appealing to me about women that other people consider “bitches” - people like Anna Wintour and Martha Stewart. I’m drawn to aesthetes, people for whom, the pursuit of beauty and perfection is everything. These are women who hold themselves to incredibly high standards, with visions so clear that they push relentlessly to bring them to life. For them, “good enough” isn’t even close. Though at times they may come off as “mean”; they seem to really be about pursuing excellence and pushing others to elevate.

I can relate to their impatience with people who don’t share this world view. I get worked up when I observe bad service, or half-baked effort in any area of life. To me, the pursuit of excellence itself is the noblest act—even more so than achieving it. I have less understanding for people who don’t try than for those who fail. Maybe the difference between myself and women like Anna and Martha is that for them, the pursuit alone isn’t enough—they go all the way!

Defying Family Pressure

One thing that struck me early in the documentary was Martha’s decision to marry her first husband, against the wishes of her father, who opposed the marriage because he was Jewish. That at 19, Martha had already decided to live life on her own terms, reflects her courage to defy societal and familial expectations—a recurring theme in her life and in my writing. And it’s a reminder of how external pressures can stop us from pursuing our full potential. Martha didn’t let her family hold her back; she made her choice. And while the marriage was far from perfect, it was her destiny to become Martha Stewart.

Womanhood ≠ Motherhood  

Motherhood was another eye-opening part of Martha’s story. She admitted that it didn’t come naturally to her, and honestly, this is a conversation we need to have more often. There’s a persistent myth that all women are naturally maternal and somehow innately suited for motherhood. I have to admit I once believed this myself—until I became a mom and saw other women realize too late, that motherhood wasn’t for them. While I still believe motherhood is the most beautiful thing, I accept that it’s not for every woman. Martha’s honesty in admitting her struggles opens the door for this necessary conversation.

A young Martha Stewart cooking at home.

Life in Chapters

I love that Martha lived multiple lives. It’s something I’ve written about before—how, in my later years in New York, I started feeling a creeping sense of malaise. Every year felt like a repeat: working at different fashion companies, summers in the Hamptons, Halloween costumes, Market Week, Christmas—and then the cycle would start all over again. I wanted to be one of those women who, at 70, could tell her grandkids about all the different places she’d lived and different things she’d done.

Martha’s life embodies this spirit. She started as a model, went to college, worked in finance, then pivoted to homemaking. She didn’t just dabble; she went all in—from creating a home to starting a catering business to becoming the CEO and public figure we all know today. Her story is proof that your next life is always waiting if you’re willing to pivot. It’s a reminder to all of us that reinvention is always on the table and that there’s no limit to what you can become.

Homemaking as a Form of Art

Martha took something as simple as “being the mom at home” and elevated it into a craft, something worth celebrating. So many women do this work while feeling they should be somewhere else, feeling guilty, or resenting it. But Martha showed that it could be something beautiful, something intentional.

Even when she became famous and built a huge business, she never lost sight of that art. It wasn’t all about “growing the business” or just branding; she was fully committed to the craft itself—cooking, gardening, sewing, cleaning. She took all those small, everyday acts and gave them value. I think that’s very freeing for a lot of women. Not everyone has a second career or a side hustle; for some women, their focus is their home. And Martha made it okay to be proud of that.

You Are You and That Is Your Superpower

One lesson I needed a refresh on was sticking to your guns. When the vision for her very first book did not match that of her publishers, Martha insisted it be her way or the highway. This sense of sticking to her vision, of knowing exactly what she wanted and not wavering, was inspiring.

I relate to that feeling of needing to stay true to your vision. Anytime I try to stray from what I believe in or start comparing myself to others, I see my focus slip. It’s easy to lose momentum when you start chasing what everyone else is doing, especially in a world where originality feels rare or sameness is rewarded by an algorithm. Martha reminded me that what makes your work special is you—your vision, your personal style, your voice. In a very crowded landscape, that little lesson was exactly the reminder I needed: stick to your guns, because it’s you who brings something unique to anything you create.

On Accountability or Lack Of

An amusing and noticeable thing about Martha is that she doesn’t seem to take a lot of accountability. For instance, on her honeymoon, she kisses another guy while her husband was back at the hotel. Her response? Shrugging it off like it was no big deal. She also confesses to an extra-marital affair of her own and her attitude was pretty dismissive.

Then there’s the whole stock-tip scandal. I honestly think she got a raw deal. It felt unfair and ridiculous, especially given how James Comey, who later went after Hillary Clinton, seemed to make it a personal mission to bring her down. Did she get insider info? Probably, but should she have gone to prison over it? Seems excessive.

Does this sound like someone who’s big on taking accountability? Not really. But maybe that’s part of what’s made her so successful. To make it at her level, you probably need a bit of that ruthlessness and the ability to move on without constantly looking back.

On Betrayal

While she was married, her husband cheated on her multiple times, and it was heartbreaking. Reading her letters to him, you can feel the toll it took on her.

One of the women he cheated with was someone she had helped in many ways. What’s the takeaway from this experience? Does it mean we shouldn’t help others? That would be a sad lesson. It makes us question just how careful we need to be about who we let into our lives and homes. Martha had the space, the means, and the generosity, but her kindness was taken for granted in the worst way. I’m honestly not sure what the lesson is here, but for someone who enjoys being open and generous, it definitely leaves a lot to think about.

Martha the cover girl at 81.

Know When to Leave

Staying on her marriage—when the documentary shows her sharing the letters she wrote to her husband, it’s clear she stayed too long in it. She even admits it herself. The longer you stay, the harder it is to leave, and it’s not worth sacrificing your peace. Because when you’re being cheated on for very long, it’s almost like they start to resent you for tolerating it. Staying in that situation can break you down in ways that are hard to come back from. And let’s be real—time is precious, especially for women. Modern society tells us not to worry about age, but we know the reality. Every year spent in a bad marriage is time you could be using to find someone better, to find someone who truly values you.

You have to know when to cut your losses, whether it’s before marriage or during. When you reach that level of betrayal and self-destruction, the best thing you can do is leave.

Seeing the Big Picture

Martha didn’t care about sticking to the “high-end” image of a Greenwich or Westport mom—she had the vision for how big her brand could be and went for that Kmart deal. Even now, everyone’s chasing luxury and wanting to be associated with designer brands. But Martha saw where the real market was: mass appeal. She understood that connecting with everyday American women, reaching them through thousands of stores, was where the true potential lay. She didn’t let judgments, appearances or getting kicked out of the Greenwich Garden Club stop her; she wanted everyone to be part of her brand, and she made it happen. Incredible.

Freedom in Losing Control

The last big lesson that really struck me was the idea of being set free by the very thing you fear most. For Martha, losing control was her ultimate fear—she’s a perfectionist through and through. When her marriage ended, even though she didn’t love him anymore, the lack of control over what was happening in her life, over the direction of her relationship, completely unraveled her. The same thing happened when she went to prison: nothing she could do would change the outcome. But once she came out on the other side, it seemed like she had this newfound freedom—she’d faced her worst fears and survived.

It reminds me of a time in my own career in the notoriously fickle fashion industry. I worked for a brand with a toxic culture, and stayed too long in the relationship. Eventually, I was laid off and my position was eliminated. It was a good blow to my ego. I’d always been driven by a desire for excellence and one of my biggest fears was being seen as anything less than top-tier. But then I quickly found a better paying job with bigger volume, and smarter people. It turned out to be the best thing for me.

That experience changed me. I realized that facing what I’d feared most—losing my role had zero impact on my standing, my “reputation” or my trajectory. It didn’t break me; it freed me. I don’t carry the same fear now because I know I’ll be okay, even if things don’t go as planned. Sometimes, losing what you thought was essential shows you just how resilient you really are and frees you for other opportunities that lie ahead.

Conclusion

Ultimately, Martha’s life and choices remind us that being true to ourselves is the most powerful way to live. Whether it’s pivoting from one role to the next, setting boundaries in our relationships, or finding freedom by confronting our biggest fears, her story shows that we don’t have to be defined by any single chapter. We have the freedom to change, grow, and hold on to what’s truly important. Watching her story unfold reaffirmed for me the importance of resilience, self-trust, and a willingness to pursue life on your own terms—qualities that define not only Martha but also the kind of women I admire and aspire to be.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on the documentary!